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With more and more adults today delaying marriage, focusing on careers, solo parenting or opting out of the dating scene altogether, parents are having a harder time communicating with the younger generation. While it once may have been acceptable to ask the question, "So when are you getting married?" today's matrimonial landscape has changed drastically. No longer are adults expected to settle down, have 2.5 kids and a mortgage all before they turn 30. And with so many divorced families, it's not surprising that today's generation is gun shy about the prospect of life-long commitment.

"My daughter saw what happened with my marriage and it devastated her because she considered me and my husband to be the only normal, happy couple she knew. We were her role models for marriage," says Erica, a divorced New York resident. "She has no desire to ever marry, nor do any of her friends or anyone she knows. I try to tell her that she should get married some day to someone who loves her and is worthy of her, but it goes in one ear and out the other."

Of course, just because times have changed, that doesn't mean that you have. Many parents still want to see their children happily settled with a spouse and children. So how does a well-meaning parent face the changing reality while still stressing the importance of family and community? Here are some tips to help you get started:

1. Share your wisdom. You might have grown up in a different era, but the more things change, the more they stay the same. Discussing your own experiences, good and bad, is a great way to help adult children sort out their own issues about marriage and the possibility of starting a family. Even if you've been divorced, make sure you don't come off as a cynic. Avoid talking negatively about commitment. Explain the lessons you learned and lead by example in showing openness to love and relationships.

2. Don't preach or pressure. The last thing you ever want to do is pressure your adult children to marry or find a partner. One of the top complaints single people have is overbearing parents who are constantly asking them when they'll settle down. In fact, pressure from the media, friends and family can become so grating that it can lead your children to adopt a negative attitude about commitment as an act of rebellion. Instead of nagging, talk to them about their love lives and show them that you will be supportive no matter what they decide. In doing so, they will be more likely to seek out your counsel when they're faced with tough choices in the future.

3. Teach the art of compromise. Every generation picks on the one that comes after it. So it's no surprise that today's generation often gets flack for being more self-oriented or, dare we say, even a bit selfish when it comes to relationships. After all, they were taught the principles of self-actualization and achievement rather than compromise and team work. Help them understand that relationships take work and compromise by sharing examples from your own life experience.

4. Manage their expectations. With so many of today's adults seeking the perfect soul mate, expectations are skyrocketing out of control. It's not enough that a potential partner be financially solvent, stable and relatively good looking, now they have to match a whole slew of exotic requirements, such as "loves opera" and "enjoys southern French cooking." Unfortunately, great expectations can lead to even greater disappointment, since very few people can ever live up to them. The key to keeping your children's hopes in check is to instill the idea that no one is "perfect," not even them. Try to stress the important qualities that made you happy with your partner so they can revise their own criteria.

Ready for more? Check out more stories in our Relationships section.

Elina Furman is the author of Kiss and Run: The Single, Picky, and Indecisive Girl's Guide to Overcoming Her Fear of Commitment. www.kissrunbook.com